Just because you’re afraid of being alone isn’t a good reason to stay in a relationship. For you to stay in that situation is a betrayal and dishonor to yourself. When you stay stuck in that illusion of happiness, just to be with someone you lose your connection to your self-worth. At that point you’re being unsupported, unappreciated and/or unacknowledged in your relatioship. When you have to give yourself a reason to stay and think happiness, joy and love is just around the corner, you’re minimizing you! We also often get into relationships with the wrong people just because we are afraid and don’t want to be alone.
I know it’s hard to realize that the way we treat ourselves sets an example for others as to how to treat us, but it’s true. Many of us allow people to treat us the way they have because we have no idea we can be treated better. Being treated badly becomes acceptable because we think it’s better than being alone. I’ve been guilty of it myself and just wanted to hold on to her, just so I could say, “I have a woman!” During my weakened state of being due to unfortunate events in my life. She treated me bad because I allowed her to treat me bad and I was treating myself bad by not loving, honoring and respecting myself enough to know better. That was the ultimate act of me betraying me! The ultimate insult to self-love! By the time I acknowledged to myself what was happening and tried to change it, it was too late. I’d let it go on for so long it became common place to her and I couldn’t change it, she was too comfortable with it. After acknowledging it to myself and trying to make a change, I could no longer claim being a victim. If I stayed, I would be creating and facilitating the abuse, dishonor and disrespect I was receiving. So I left and never looked back! It was hard but every time I felt uneasy about it, I reminded myself how bad I was treated and I had taken enough, time to let go and grow.
There’s nothing wrong with staying in a relationship to work things out but when nothings working it’s time to go. There’s nothing wrong with being alone, it’s better than being treated bad. It allows you time to become more aware of you, heal, heighten your level of consciousness, self-love and get back in touch with your self-worth. Being alone treating your self better will be an example to the next person entering your life how to treat you.
You may think being alone is worse than being in a relationship that isn’t working. Take some time for you to have an open honest conversation with you. Tell yourself the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth! He or she who lies to themselves is a fool! Ask yourself, “Why am I afraid to be alone with me? Why do I continue to allow them to treat me bad? Is this the best I can do? Why do I stay in this relationship? Am I truly loving, honoring and respecting myself? Is this where I want to be? Are they ever going to change? Are they actively working towards change? Write the answers down and read them to yourself out loud! Hear yourself speaking the truth that is coming from within you. Then make a decision as to the direction you want to go and stick to it!
Spend some time with you and you’ll realize you can consult, console and respond appropriately to anything! There’s nothing wrong with being alone sometime. If you can’t stand to be alone with you, how can you expect anyone else to want too!